A brief glimpse into the daily happenings of a 6-year-old, his new baby brother and his family.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Prince Charming

I'm not really sure what I'm being buttered up for, but it must be something big. Quotes from the last few days:

Thursday, while getting dressed in the AM

H: There you go! You're all dressed.
B: (looks himself up and down, then looks me up and down) Wow, Mom. You know what?

H: What?
B: We're HOT! We look goooooooooooood.


Wednesday afternoon
B: Mommy, you're such a tiny thing. You're SOOOOOOO cute.


Monday evening
B: What can I help ya' do, Babe?
H: Well, I'm making dinner...

B: I'll be your sa-sis-tant (assistant). You're the master, Mom.
H: That's great. Thanks for helping me.

B: Of course. You're de-wight-ful.

These little moments have been sprinkled with a frequent dose of "Awww, Mom. You're the best." I wonder what he wants.... or maybe more accurately... I wonder what he DID.

Side note: He still hasn't noticed that Baseball isn't swimming around. Now I find myself sending him over to talk to "the fish", just to see how long it's going to take.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

When will it be summer?

Because today was one of those days when you feel like it's going to be cold and miserable outside forever.

details: June 2005. Ben was 10 months old and not the least bit ashamed of his flabby baby boobies.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Big News

What an exciting week! Full of big happenings and big news. Ok, STOP. Do you seriously think I'm knocked up? Enough. I'm not. Move on.

This week has been a week of milestones. Ben has officially stopped peeing in his sleep. Wa-hoo! Now if we can just convince him that he really doesn't need to wear a pull-up at night. It's not required. Really, he can just wear underwear. This seems completely crazy to him and we continue to have long conversations about it each night at bedtime that end in me sighing and giving in to a pull-up.

Second milestone of the week: Ben has a "real" pet. He informed me on Monday that he was very sad because he didn't have a pet. "What about those two hairy smelly things that wander our house eating your snacks," I asked. Nope. Those things? Those are "yours and Daddy's pets." I stand corrected. What he really needed, he lamented, was a pet of his very own. Better yet, two pets. Maybe dogs. Nope? Not giving in? Well, how about fish? Well played, Little Man. Start with something so outrageous that even you know it's not going to happen. Then, slide in something that, by contrast, seems not only reasonable, but maybe even a GOOD idea.

Tuesday after school, we trudged to the pet store and Ben chose two of the most beautiful 12-cent "feeder" goldfish he could find. ("Feeder" as in they the goldfish they FEED to the real fish.) We got the tank all ready and introduced the guys (gals? how do you tell?) to their new home.

Their names, you ask? Well, we went through several naming cycles. When he first mentioned getting fish, he only wanted one and he was going to name it Barack Obama (can you tell who Mommy and Daddy might be supporting in our upcoming election?). Then, he realized, hey-- one fish is great, but two is better. He thought "Harper's Best Friend" and "Abby's Best Friend" were perfect names. But, when it came down to it, that's far too much to say when you are giving fish a verbal instruction, so he settled on "Baseball" and "Team." You know... Baseball Team.


"Baseball" is all orange, "Team" has a black stripe


Ben spent the next hour sitting on the floor watching them swim around. About every 5 minutes, he'd climb up by the tank, hug it and then flick the lights on and off.. on and off... on and off... (only really quickly). I mentioned that the poor fish were going to have seizures and that I didn't know fishy-CPR, so he should lay off the light show.

There may have been something to that seizure thing because Friday morning, I went over to the tank and found that Baseball was, ummm, "out of the park". Before Ben woke up, Don and I said a few kind words about good ol' Baseball and sent him to his final resting place.


All day I waited for Ben to notice that "Team" was without a sport. I silently practiced all sorts of scenarios for where he had gone..... Baseball camp? SCHOOL (get it?)? That "Baseball" was really a secret agent and had been called away on a top secret mission to the toilet? That he had joined the "Disney on Ice" production of Finding Nemo? The kid never asked.

So, here it is Saturday night and another day has gone by without Ben noticing that one of his beloved pets is gone. Man, I'm glad we didn't decide to buy him a little brother or sister.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Ooooh, Barracuda

Ben is well on his way to becoming a rock star. He prefers classic guitar rock and won't play "Freebird" no matter how much you yell.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Just Doin' Our Thing

Last Friday, we headed to dinner at a local Mexican restaurant. We were seated next to a huge sign that said, "Jose Cuervo Margaritas 2 for $7 EVERYDAY!". Well, if you insist. It had been a "bit of a week", so when the waitress asked if I'd like another margarita, I said that, yes, I really did. Thank you for asking.

Waitress: Would you like another margarita?
H: Actually, I would. Thank you.
B: Excuse me, but I want a marga-ree-ter, too.

W: You do? May I see some ID?
B: Here ya' go (holds up the Mexican flag toothpick that was stuck in his corn masa--- smarty pants)

W: Well, that's good enough for me.
B: (as we waves his hand in the air toward the waitress)Yeah, I need a marga-ree-ter. You go do your thing.

So proud. All the hard work we've put in teaching him how to speak to others and to be an upstanding citizen. My kid puts it to use ordering underage alcoholic beverages.

When the waitress returned, she had a margarita for me and a shot glass for Ben. The shot glass looked like a marga-reet-er... it had a lime wedge and everything. She had mixed a little Sprite with some lime juice. He was, well, about as excited as I was to see my margarita.

After he thanked her for his drink, he held his new drink high in the air and said, "Cheers, everyone. Cheers to marga-ree-ters." Yep. I'll drink to that.

After tasting his "ree-ter", he said, "Whew. That is some sour water. I really like it."

Friday, January 25, 2008

That Creepy Uncle

Perhaps in families larger than ours (only children who marry only children, you know), creepy uncles aren't so rare. In our family, however, we don't have any. We have to look beyond our stubby little family tree to give Ben the weird uncle experience.

Thank goodness for tax season. More to the point, thank goodness for those poor souls who stand at busy intersections dressed up as Uncle Sam and wave at traffic in hopes of....what? Inspiring someone to have their taxes done RIGHT NOW. By a company who believes that credibility comes from a costume rental store. And, may we reflect a moment on how much that job sucks. You dress like Uncle Sam (or the Statue of Liberty) in the freezing cold and wave for hours on end. Have you noticed these people? It's nuts.

As we've driven by the "Sams" in the past week, I've been pointing them out to Ben. Usually saying something like, "Wave at Uncle Sam, Ben. He's waving at you." -or- "Hi, Uncle Sam!" Ben is pretty non-committal about Uncle Sam. I don't know whether he senses the ridiculousness of the "Sam Situation" or if he's just freaked out by strangers waving at him, but today he put me in my place.

H: Look, Ben! There's Uncle Sam. He's waving at us.
B: He's waving at everyone, Mommy. (yes, he used THAT tone.)
H: Sure. Wave to him.
B: No way. He's scary and pooo-key (spooky).

H: Why is he scary? It's friendly to wave at people (by now we've driven down the road and are long past Uncle Sam).
B: That is not my Uncle, Mom. I'm NEVER waving to him. I'm gonna send the Ninja Turtles and Planet Heroes to pie-ya him. I won't even look again.

So there, Liberty Tax Service. You will not be our tax man, nor will you be our uncle.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

World's Slowest Sweatshop

After months of good intentions, I have finally decided to launch a little mommy cottage industry. I'll be cranking out less-than-expertly made baby/toddler items that non-sewers seem to love (ooohh.. maybe THAT's my slogan). I've been making baby blankets with big fuzzy initials for a few people and will add some little jumpers, dresses, overalls (with big, silly ruffles at the ankle for girls), pants, maybe some appliqued onesies if I am inspired. Once I have a few samples made, I'll launch a separate blog that will post photos of the items and allow people to order, etc.

All of this began when one of my Kindermusik babies attended class last week in a darling little jumper. Then I went to a local "mom and pop" fabric store and found the most adorable Valentine's Day fabric. I decided that Baby Hannah clearly needed one... ok, so maybe this all began when Katie had a baby girl almost a year ago.... Anyway, here's the dress:


front view


back view



When I delivered the dress to Katie and Hannah on Monday, I got my first order from another mom in class. Watch out Baby Gap... here comes:

Pink Elephant
The World's Slowest Sweatshop

-or-

Pink Elephant

Less-Than-Expertly-Made-Baby/Toddler-Items that Non-sewers Seem to Love

-or-- maybe just:


Pink Elephant


Pink Elephant is now online at: http://www.pinkelephantbaby.blogspot.com