Almost 5

For the last few weeks, anytime someone asks Ben how old he is, he replies, "Almost 5. And, I'm going to Kindergarten." Ummm. Excuse me, but where did the last 5 years go?

I took Ben for his 5 year check up last week and visited with a new mommy and her 6 day old son. Was that really me "almost 5" years ago? I barely remember a time when Ben wasn't potty trained and getting his own snacks in the kitchen. On the other hand, was it really that long ago that we were just figuring out how to hold him so he'd fall asleep and just which funny face would make him laugh so his whole chubby little body shook?

When I taught, I never understood those weepy freakshow parents (ok, mostly MOMS) who tearfully dropped their child off for the first day of school. I think my comment was, "Dude. It's school. It's not like you're sending your child to war." I may have also said, "Never. Never ever will I be a 'cry mom'. I'm gonna be the mom with my foot on my kid's butt kicking him out of the car when he goes to school. I would NEVER cry. Whatever."

Ummmmmmmm.....yeah. As with so many other things, the kiss of death was saying, "I would never..". Because, guess what? I'm going to be that blubbering, ugly-crying, freakshow, train wreck of a mommy in two weeks when I take my boy to school. What I realize now is that it's not sadness that brings the tears. It's a realization that your baby is not a baby. There is nothing remotely baby left. It's intense pride in sending your little chick out of the nest and into the big, big world. It's all your hopes and wishes and dreams for the future.

Good grief. Will someone please hand me a Kleenex? Maybe a whole box?