An Almost-4 Ben Says

Concerning his "head trauma" at Silver Dollar City:
B: Do you know what happened on my bay-cation?
Riley: What?
B: Well. My daddy "fro-ed" my head into a ceiling fan. Do you know what a ceiling fan is? (lots of gesturing and flailing)
R: Yeah. A ceiling fan is a fan on a ceiling.
B: Yeah. Well, my daddy froed may head into one and it went SCHWOOP and SMACK and SPLAT (even more gesturing and flailing)
R: Woah.
B: And there was blood everywhere. And I got new shirt, and Daddy got a new shirt, and we all got ice cream.

Last night as I was making dinner:
H (to Don): (discussing people who run while pregnant--I AM NOT PREGNANT) I don't know if I could run. Remember when I was pregnant with Ben I had all that sciatic nerve pain.
B: I didn't give you certain nerve pain. It wasn't me.
H: No, not today. Before you were born.
B: Huh?
H: When you were in Mommy's tummy.
B: (pauses) How did I get out of your tummy.
H: (pauses--- looks at Don who is terribly amused by the question) Well. When it's time for babies to be born, mommies go to the hospital and have a baby.
B: But how?
H: The babies come out at the hospital.
B: But MOMMY, how? How do they come out?
H: (LONG pause) The mommies go to the hospital and a special doctor helps. WOULD YOU LIKE SOME FRUIT SNACKS OR A JUICE BOX?

This morning as I was folding laundry:
B: Oh no! (holds up a bra) Mommy! Why are your boobs on the floor?
H: Honey, that's not "boobs" that's a bra.
B: What's a bra?
H: It's where you put your boobs during the day. (I'm sure THAT one won't come back to haunt me)

This afternoon while he was waiting to get his haircut, Ben played with some other children who were also waiting for a haircut. One little girl was pushing and shoving other kids out of her way. As she approached Ben:
B: (puts his hand out to stop her from getting any closer) Settle down there, Polly Pushes-a-Lot!

Sometimes I think it wouldn't be the worst thing if he was:
1) Shy
2) Quiet
3) Less Intelligible